Bratwurst and schnapps

An office building in central Melbourne is holding a wine and food tasting. Since this is during business hours, moderate consumption will no doubt be encouraged. What are "Australien" producers? Australien is the transliteration of Australia in Danish, German, and Swedish. I'm going to attend this tasting tomorrow. Perhaps it will incorporate the cuisine of Western Europe, hence the typo.

Making a goat of yourself

I've no idea who wrote the copy for this supermarket's website. A subsidiary of Parmalat, Paul's is a leading manufacturer of diary products in Australia. It also makes goat milk. Not only is Paul's incorrectly spelt as "Paws," the paragraph ends in a jumble of disjointed adjectives and nouns, and some confusingly placed hyphens.

Land of chocolate

Last night I met up with some of my friends from my growth group at Crossway Moreland to visit the Max Brenner chocolate bar at the QV Building on Swanston Street. I'm not that much of a chocoholic, so I settled for a cup of white chocolate mocha and a dark chocolate biscuit, which I thoroughly enjoyed. It was my first visit to this establishment, and I plan to visit it again, if only occasionally. Scientific research has shown that chocolate consumption triggers the release of mood-altering endorphins in the brain. The same result can also be achieved through exercise or writing a cheque. This is a picture of one of a Max Brenner hug mug, which despite its slightly off-putting shape, is specially designed to be held in both hands, so as to add to your enjoyment of the drink.

Aye, laddie

My palate has been on quite an adventure over the last few days. On Sunday I paid a visit to the Cuckoo, Olinda's famous home of Bavarian cuisine, in the picturesque Dandenongs. Part of the afternoon was spent enjoying food, reasonably pleasant conversation, and a floor show featuring accordion music, bell ringing, yodelling, and bawdy jokes. This was a function put on by Club Solo, which is a ministry to Christian singles. This is only the second event of there's that I've ever attended. My reason for going was to find out more about their forthcoming camp in Brisbane in January, which I plan to attend during my annual leave. Before committing to attend, I wanted to hear from others who may have attended in previous years what they thought of it, and also what sort of crowd was likely to be there. In any event, I'm looking forward to seeing more of southern Queensland and surrounds, and hopefully hearing some good Christian teaching. The only parts of Queensland I've visited to date are Surfer's Paradise and Brisbane.

Last night it was time to immerse myself in my Scottish heritage. I visited my family to partake of a hearty dinner of haggis, vegetables, and Yorkshire pudding. The key to eating haggis is to try and ignore its ingredients, which aren't very pleasant, and focus on the taste, which is. In other words, close your eyes and think of Scotland. In any case, it would be unadvisable to eat this dish more than occasionally. The accompanying beverage was Irn-Bru (pronounced "Iron Brew"), Scotland's top-selling brand of soft drink. Irn-Bru is known for its distinctive bright orange colour and excessively sugary flavour. According to the Lonely Planet guide to Scotland, one glass removes all the enamel from your teeth. Regular untramelled consumption of it would allow my dentist to continue to indulge his hobby of amateur motorcycle racing, but that's another story. This drink is also reputedly quite effective as a hangover cure, not that I'd know anything about that.

Come and get it

August is birthday month in my family. My birthday, as well as that of my twin brother and mother, all fall within this month. This is usually commemorated with a low-key celebration of some description. This year we decided to visit Belhannah Lebanese restaurant in Ivanhoe. Part of the experience in eating cuisine from the non-English speaking world is ordering difficult to pronounce dishes from the menu. It is common in Asian restaurants to get around this problem by numbering each menu item. Hence, all that is required to order is to recite the number rather than the name of the dish. In a somewhat misguided attempt to demonstrate how cosmopolitan and acculturated I am (not very, as it turns out), I asked for each menu item I wished to order by name. This backfired on me when the waitress corrected my pronunciation of the dishes, which somehow sounded more Italian than Lebanese. Other members of my family more sensibly chose to point out to the waitress the menu items they wanted, saying to her, "Can I have this, please?" Solomon once wrote (pardon the paraphrase) that pride comes before a fall (Proverbs 11:2). How right he was. Little did I know that truth would be affirmed in a suburban restaurant on a Saturday night.